


Broken

by suitandtaeee



Series: sing to my mind [5]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Biting, Choking, Doggy Style, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Hand Kink, High Sex, Recreational Drug Use, Smut, Stoner Suna Rintarou, Suicidal Thoughts, Suna Rintarou Is An Ass Guy, Suna Rintarou is bad at feelings, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Vaginal Fingering, Weed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-02
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-14 12:34:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29791977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/suitandtaeee/pseuds/suitandtaeee
Summary: Can you break my bones?Will you tear my skin?Can you taste my lust?Can you feel my sin?(Broken by Lund)tl;dr: I’m here to add to the pile of stoner Suna content. Quite some angst laced in this too. Please check the tags before reading!
Relationships: Suna Rintarou & Reader, Suna Rintarou/Reader
Series: sing to my mind [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2189832
Kudos: 36





	Broken

It started as it always does: with two beats of your ringtone. Then it goes straight to voicemail, but he never leaves any.

This is your guys’ sign. You know you don't even need to pick up, all you have to do is text him a few simple words and that's all the communication you two need. It worked the first time five months ago and it's been working like that ever since.

You swiped through your messages until you found his contact name and hovered your thumbs over the keyboard for a few seconds, expectantly.

**You [11:04pm]** :  _ on my way _

What was shaping up to be another dull Thursday night would soon have you intoxicated and with your head being pressed against Suna’s mattress. 

Simple as that.

This had become a common occurrence a few times a week for the last five months. You met Suna at your friend Aran’s 21st birthday party, the brunette introducing you to his old high school friends, and you instantly caught Suna’s eye. Though, you could say the same for him, because something about his presence had you wrapped around his pinky before you even knew it. 

A few people around you were smoking and chatting, sat on Aran’s kitchen counter, and as Suna took a drag off his joint he held it out in front of you. You remember him saying something along the lines of “I don’t usually offer my shit to random people, you know”, but the smirk he said it with is more than crystal clear in your memories. You gladly accepted his offer, smoking and talking about completely trivial things with him. 

Later that night, you and Suna fucked in Aran’s guest bathroom. 

In a drunk and high haze, your hands scrambled to hold onto his unbuttoned shirt as he pushed you against the sink counter with each strong thrust. Your hot breaths fogged up the mirror and the small yet desperate sounds coming from both of your mouths still ring clear in your mind despite being intoxicated at the time. You remember having to leave the party shortly after that, but not before hearing Atsumu wolf-whistle at Suna the second you two exited the bathroom looking, well,  _ guilty _ .

After that night, you had dismissed Suna as just another messy hookup, and you thought he had too. You hadn’t even gotten his phone number. That was until you bumped head first into him two weeks later in the smoking area of a bar one fateful Friday night. He was wearing the same loose black button up shirt and had the same devious smirk plastered on his face as the night you two first met. 

One thing led to another and before you knew it, what was once just a casual one night stand had now become a regular arrangement of smoke and orgasms. He would call you, or you would call him, for no longer than two rings, and a few moments later the caller would get a reply confirming or turning down the invitation.

Now, it doesn’t take a genius to know that you’re both in this for the completely wrong reasons. You’re not looking for love. Hell, you’re not even looking for companionship. You just need something to numb your brain. Something exactly like what Suna’s eyes convey when he looks at you, or what your fingertips feel like when they graze the nape of his neck. 

Because when you’re around each other, you don’t have to think. You don’t have to maneuver around someone’s expectations or put up a fake front. To others, this may seem cold and distant. And they’re not entirely wrong, but what “others” fail to see is the comfort behind it. The pure and unfiltered calmness in being with someone that knows how to turn off that switch in your brain.

You both have issues. You both use your peculiar little arrangement to patch it up temporarily. 

You both know it’s not healthy, but it gets the job done. At least for the time being.

Tonight was no different, or so you thought.

_ Car keys. House keys. Wallet. Should I bring my lighter? No, he has spare ones. _

You ran a mental check of everything you needed whenever you two meet.

_ Condoms? I’ll just bring a couple, I can’t remember if we ran out. _

As you were about to leave your apartment, you caught your own reflection in the mirror by your door.

_ Should I change? This isn’t a particularly cute outfit. _

You ran your fingers through your hair. Perhaps you should’ve chosen a sultrier look, something more suggestive than a baggy t-shirt and straight legged trousers.

_ Eh, he doesn’t care. _

Closing the door behind you, you took the elevator down to the parking garage of your apartment complex, threw yourself onto the driver’s seat and your bag on the front passenger seat, and drove off.

–––––––––––

As always, his door was already cracked open so you let yourself in.

You spotted Suna sprawled out on the sofa, the usual smoking setup already on his coffee table. At the sound of your footsteps and the door locking he turned to look at you over the back of his seat.

“Hey” he calmly nods at you

You kicked your shoes off and slumped down on the seat next to him, immediately reaching for the grinder and rolling paper. Suna lowly chuckled at you.

“Eager are we?”

You twisted the cap of the grinder before taking it off and pouring some weed onto the sheet of tobacco paper. Carefully placing the filter, your fingers worked quick and swift motions, rolling the joint before sealing it with your tongue. For how fast you rolled it, it looked pretty decent, your practice over the last few months must’ve paid off somehow. You grabbed the pink lighter from the table and lit it up, eyes closed and satisfied once the warm smoke tickled your throat and lungs, pulling the joint off your lips and exhaling slowly.

“I need to unwind”

He turned his face away from you and faced the black TV screen in front of him, taking a drag of his own joint and slowly letting a cloud of smoke cascade out of his lips.

“Isn’t that why we meet anyways?”

You ponder on his words for a moment.

“I guess” you exhaled smoke again “this shit is good, by the way”

“Thanks, plug said it was some new stuff he tried recently and liked it. Figured we could try it too”

_ Well. _

Turns out this “new stuff” was quite a bit stronger than you had anticipated, and not long after finishing up your joint you were sat on Suna’s lap, arms lazily locked behind his neck with his hands resting on your ass as you kissed feverishly. His lips tasted smoky sweet, long fingers roamed the curves of your butt before squeezing lightly, making you sigh into his mouth. Suna’s always been an ass guy.

One of your hands slowly trailed from his neck down to the front of his sweatpants, palming him experimentally. He tightened his grip on you in response, not once breaking your slow yet purposeful kiss when he got you both up from his sofa and walked into his bedroom.

He sat down on the edge of his bed with you still on his lap and tugged at the edge of your t-shirt signaling for you to take it off. You wordlessly did as instructed, and he followed suit with his own top, clothes discarded on the floor without a care in the world. Shuffling further into the bed and resting his back on the headboard, Suna pulled you back onto his lap and dragged kisses along your jaw, softly biting your earlobe and sending a shiver straight down your spine.

His lips trailed down to your breasts, nipping and sucking small purple marks onto the skin before pulling at your bra strap with his teeth. You took this as a sign to unclasp it, letting it join the pile of clothes on the floor. Wasting no time, one of his hands massaged your breasts while his tongue paid attention to the opposite nipple, and  _ jesus fuck _ , you’d always been sensitive but whenever it was Suna working you, the right buttons were being pushed and you were putty in his hands. 

You swear you heard him groan at how responsive you were. He shouldn’t be surprised, though.

You moved to grip him through his sweatpants again but he swatted your hand away. Instead, his own hand found its way inside your trousers and started softly rubbing in circles through your underwear, making you hiss quietly at the sudden rush of blood straight down to your clit. He worked you at a delicious pace, his skilled fingers pushing the fabric aside and lazily pushing inside you. You rested your forehead on his, absentmindedly rutting your hips against his hand, but his other hand tightened on your hip, intently keeping you in place. He worked you open, fingers deliciously pushing against your walls. 

Those  _ god damn masterful fingers _ , they would be the death of you. 

You pulled away slightly and locked eyes with Suna, breaths heavy and ragged, and for a moment you swear you can see through each other’s troubles. His eyes were red and heavy lidded, pupils blown wide and  _ absolutely devouring you _ . This felt like the most lucid glance you’d ever shared. As if by silent agreement, you crashed your lips together again and his fingers went back to working wonders inside you.

Your soft whimpers slowly started turning into breathy moans, and before you could get any closer to the edge, Suna’s hand moved from your trousers to underneath your thigh, flipping you both around and placing you on your knees in front of him. He pushed your trousers and underwear down at once, letting you shimmy them off yourself completely while he did the same with his sweatpants.

The last thing you heard was the faint sound of plastic being torn behind you before Suna pushed himself inside you in one languid thrust that made your eyes roll back slightly and an embarrassing sound leave your mouth.

“Ah- fuck!” you arched your back and rested your weight on your forearms.

It seemed Suna was just as desperate as you, because as soon as he sheathed himself inside you completely, he was pulling back and thrusting in again, building a steady rhythm. One of his hands kept a bruising grip on your hips, while the other moved to wrap around your throat, swiftly pulling you back up and against his bare chest. He thrusted inside you without abandon, the sounds of your moaning and slicked skin pressing together filling up the air in the room.

His hot breath fanned on the inside of your neck while he sped up, now hitting at a new angle. Suna groaned deeply against your skin when your pussy pulsed against his cock, and almost mindlessly he started swiping two fingers from side to side on your clit, making you moan obscenely and your belly light on fire.

“Fuck, yes, right there– don’t stop!”

It was all so much. The way his cock rubbed against your g-spot with every thrust. The feeling of his skin on your back. The possessiveness of his hand around your throat, like a collar with his initials on it. It was all so,  _ so _ much, but it was his words that threw you head first into your orgasm.

“Shit–  _ say my name, please _ , ah– fuck”

The slow build at the pit of your stomach unravelled itself in warm waves, legs shaking as your pussy clamped down on Suna’s cock. 

“Rin! Oh god– fuck, Rin!”

Not only had he never asked you to say his name before, he was just never one to request anything from you like this during sex.

A few seconds later, his hips stilled against your ass, his grip on your throat tightening as he came with a deep grunt and your name on his lips. He lazily thrusted inside you, letting you both ride out your orgasms while he pressed wet kisses between your shoulder blades.

He pulled out of you and collapsed next to you, both staring at the ceiling trying to catch your breath. Your head spun heavily from both the weed you’d smoked and the orgasm Suna had just ripped from you.

For some reason, this comedown hit you stronger than usually. You weren’t sure if it was the drugs, the post-coital vertigo fogging up your brain, or whatever the fuck, but everything seemed to overwhelm you. Like when you’re lying down on your bed and it suddenly feels like you’re falling fifty feet below even though your body is frozen in place. For some god given reason, you were overcome with a random urge to be brutally honest.

And, to tell the truth, the words left your mouth before you could even process any of it.

“Have you ever wanted to just fucking die?”

You were met with silence but you could tell Suna was everything but shocked at your comment. For a moment it looked like he was about to reach for the lighter and grinder on his bedside table but he hesitated and put his hand back on top of his chest.

“Yeah, sometimes”

Like water spilling from an overflowing glass, your mind made no efforts to stop your thoughts from pouring out. At this point you’re convinced you said this more for yourself than to get any response.

“I’m a fucking waste of space”

You don’t notice the silent tears falling down your cheeks, your face wet and entirely devoid of any expression. Suddenly, you feel a hand take yours and lace your fingers together next to you. Out of the corner of your teary eyes, you can see Suna still staring blankly at the ceiling, but you swear there’s a slight glisten in his eyes that wasn’t there before. 

You felt him softly squeeze your hand, his long and soft fingers warm and reassuring around yours.

Those fingers, so often used to make you crumble, now seemed to put your pieces back together.

Nothing else came. You laid there in silence, staring at the ceiling until your eyelids felt too heavy to hold up.

Suna spoke the last words you heard before you drifted off into sleep.

“You’re not a waste of space. If anything, my bed feels empty when you’re not there to fill it”


End file.
